Our guest today basically teaches a master class on male-mind manipulation. And it makes me recall something I read once about people under hypnosis. It turns out – evidently – that when a subject is told that he’s being hypnotized, it doesn’t wake him up. You’d think it would. But, no… it just deepens the trance. So, pay attention or don’t; you’re fucked either way!
Okay, before we get going, let me make sure we approach you correctly!
How do you prefer to be addressed?
“In general, ‘Mistress’ or ‘Domina.’ In a dialogue, Mistress at all times.”
Great, Mistress Wira!
Here’s a basic question! How did you get into fetishes in general and the ‘Forced-Bi’ fetish in particular? (Are you surprised by your influence? By the fetish’s popularity?)
“Let Me think of a way to keep this one shorter.”
You could write a book! Haha! Sorry!
“I could be telling you (and your readers) that the first signs were there in college, or when dated My first boyfriend. But, to tell you the truth – and which I had no idea until just recently – it was when I attended kindergarten.”
No kidding?!
“That early!
“I mean… I always assumed that My kindergarten little friend and I were sweethearts. Therefore, at that time, adults around us always found us adorable.”
“Sweethearts,” huh?
“That’s what I thought it was! However, what’s interesting is the reason that we were sweethearts. My Mom just recently told me some old stories. One of these was about Me and My little friend in kindergarten. And she said that when she dropped Me off, the caregiver came up to her telling her to ‘watch and learn.’ My little friend would take the toy off the shelves that he thought I would want to play with. She told My Mom that he would not play with any other classmates until I arrived. But then he would retrieve the toy right away and we would play what I wanted to play. Never knew it until this day!”
So… your “take” on that anecdote is that you elicited submission from a young age?
“Later in school I was often surrounded by boys.”
No surprise, there!
“I never really had female friends. On the other hand, I was extraordinarily successful attracting males.
“There was a company Christmas party in My early 20s. We got drunk and had fun. When we took the obligatory group photo, one of My colleagues was seized by a sudden inspiration. Instead of saying ‘cheese,’ he jumped to the floor, grabbed My high heel, and posed as if he was swallowing it.”
Oh?? That’s a lively office! Did you immediately interpret that as a “sign”?
“I had no idea yet. But soon after that, I entered the professional BDSM scene. Even so, it took about seven to ten years before I really ‘found Myself.’
“But definitely it wasn’t something I intended or prepared Myself for. I guess you could say that it ‘just happened.’
“I remember that one of My friends told Me – at the very beginning of My career – to ‘watch out, before I ended up on a St.-Andrew’s Cross.”
Haha! What did you say to that?
“I remember answering that if it happened, I probably would not mind.
“Now that I am thinking about these things, it does bring to mind some additional questions. Because you are asking Me to speak about the topic of ‘Forced bi,’ in particular.”
Yes!
“So, what’s up with those men that were just boys playing in sandboxes back in the day? Lol!”
How did they get from there to here?
“I am aware that I have given you a rather sprawling answer when it comes to how I got into ‘Forced-Bi’ scenes!”
Bwahaha! No worries! It certainly gives readers a window into your history and perspectives!
“I guess I couldn’t give you a more specific answer! All I can say is: It just happened! Just like domination in general!”
Fair enough!
Why do you think these kinds of males are drawn to you?
“I guess I have a certain scent! Or an aptitude! Honestly, I didn’t set out to ‘turn males’ in the pertinent way.
“But… I can see why this is such a hot topic, and why it has so high a profile within domination.”
Same!
“I guess since I was starting out in the professional scene, I was taking clients who ‘had their things’ already in place – different fetishes. For example, many guys enjoy being taken anally by women. From there, it’s a few short steps to being forced down the rabbit hole.”
And… you’re the rabbit? The sub ends up dressed like Alice?
“They see a powerful Goddess and can’t help granting me a degree of control.
“Perhaps some of these males are seeking a nurturing type, and I have that sort of face. But, whatever it was, I was frequently receiving sluts.
“So, it was a given; not much of a choice.”
I see what you’re saying. When you went to “hang out your shingle,” so to speak, “Bi” enthusiasts were the ones who came knocking.
“I mentioned being ‘granted control,’ and I mean it. As women, in general, we do not use physical force like males do. Women tend to make themselves felt in other ways: by our commanding appearance, for instance, or the way we present ourselves.
“It’s like a superpower, and not everyone can do it. You need a certain facial expression, particular body language – an overall ‘vibe’ or ‘aura’ around you to immobilize men. It’s raw power.
“Back to your question, I entered the commercial scene strictly to earn money. But, when I recall My little friend from kindergarten, I suddenly believe it might have been fate 😉”
Ha! I can see that!
“Whatever the reasons – and, likely, it was a mixture of coincidences and ‘forces’ (different factors, social and financial) – from there, it just slowly evolved and crystallized into …Me.”
In the Forced-Bi fetish, what does “force” actually mean to you?
“Ultimate power.”
Bwahaha!
“Disrobing someone – literally and figuratively – and then dressing them again.”
Not necessarily the way they were before, I take it?
“In such case as cross dressers – who are fascinated with the outfits of the opposite sex – it’s just …ultimate power.”
Benign or malign?
“You have a range: from caring and encouraging to corrupting almost malevolent behavior.
“Psychologically, the owner-captor would dissect (although hopefully not literally) their prey and then stitch it back together, redesigning and reshaping the sub to the Domina’s personal liking.
“But this goes for domination in general.
“For example, it is paralleled in financial domination, where the Domina takes away the sub’s money. Stripping a man financially resets the mind eventually.
“You can do anything with them while they’re in that state. And, even better, you can make them do anything for you.
“Ideally, you want to keep them in such state as long as it fits your needs.
“The same goes for Me in scenes involving ‘force.’
“It’s about bending boundaries. It doesn’t mean the person was ‘violated’ – mentally, physically, or psychologically, whatever you wish. ‘Violation’ would be a crime.
“Forcing: advertisers ‘force’ merchandise on unsuspecting consumers all the time. And the same kind of thing happens in sales situations. When I wasn’t going to buy some product, but I end up with it anyway, that doesn’t automatically mean that I was mentally ‘raped’ or ‘sodomized.’”
Many words have wide semantic ranges. The word “forced” is no exception!
“So, if the term ‘forced’ bothers a certain group of people, then I would say that the root of the issue is to be found in knowledge. Or, more precisely, in a lack of knowledge.
“Knowledge is power; knowledge is key. I am certain the Oxford Dictionary mentions plenty illustrations of that, including instances when a particle is subjected to ‘force.’ – Or that it was the result is a creation of forces.”
So… the point is: You don’t shy away from calling the fetish “Forced Bi.” Is that it?
“I actually like the term ‘force’ much more than the tamed version of it: ‘encourage.’”
Haha! Fair enough!
Do crossdressing, pegging or strapon sessions lead a guy into Forced Bi?
“I would say Forced Bi is an umbrella. There are lot of things you can associate with it, but that you don’t have to.
“Do you want to dress them up? Would you like to paint their nails and make them wear skirts and thongs all day long? Or do you want to get them moaning hard for you? Or do you want both?”
Oh, both! <Blushing> I mean… if we’re voting!
But, seriously, are these “add-ons” the sub’s ideas? Or… yours?
“The term ‘forced’ kind of loses its power when the subs enjoy it.”
True.
“But it may not be sustainable from the standpoint of a business transaction if the sub had no attraction to or interest in these fetishes – not even a little bit.
“To ‘force’ someone, you have to make something seem interesting enough to make them want it. Once they’re hooked, you must keep pressure on.”
May I ask: How do you do that?
“In this case, you need to keep it interesting. If you have a partner who is into this fetish, then your job is half done. They will learn to dress up, to make up, to …whatever. It will pass the point of being ‘forced.’ But it will still be found in the ‘encouraged’ category.
“It’s a process, of course. Those of you who, as of today, have mastered mascara and eyeliner, probably started off scared and ashamed.
“So, a certain ‘force’ was exerted; I can’t see how it would have been possible, otherwise.”
In other words, Forced Bi can lead to ancillary fetishes. By the same token, related fetishes can also lead to Forced Bi. But, at the same time, some subs may never wander too far afield.
Have I got that right?
“Long story short: I think someone can perfectly well stay with only one fetish activity.
“Note: just because there is a facilitator in this dynamic doesn’t mean that you have to go full tilt, all the way, or whatever.”
Who chooses?
“At times – and in general – it will be the Dominant’s decision how far things go.”
It makes sense. After all, that’s what the sub is there for, presumably!
But… how do you know what the correct decision is?
“Anything the Dominant pleases is (ipso facto) the right choice!”
Haha! Okay, then!
“Any sub that objects to this is self-serving. They wouldn’t satisfy the criteria of a ‘submissive.’
“It is one thing to appropriate the label, and it’s another thing to earn it.”
Interesting!
Does Forced Bi change a sub’s sexual orientation?
“I am not a trained psychologist. So, I am unable to answer such a question properly.”
Fair enough.
“But let Me leave you with this. I think that if you can train a dog to bring you the morning paper, then you can train a person’s sexual orientation – even if only perhaps for the duration of the training or conditioning.”
Hm. That’s an angle I hadn’t previously considered. That it’s like raising the water level in a bathtub by climbing into the water. It’s not like the water stays up permanently. It goes right back as soon as you get out.
“Just so with psychological manipulation. Once the facilitator is out of the picture, the natural tendencies of the person will slowly regain strength, and everything will ‘get back to normal.’”
You’ve seen this? Or… you’re just supposing?
“One of My favorite childhood books was The Little Prince,[1] by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry. In particular, there’s a ‘teaching moment’ where a fox tells the titular prince that we are responsible for anything that we have tamed.”
So… the sexuality is plastic?
“We’re talking about antecedently straight males, right?”
Haha! You tell me!
“If you adapt to the Domina’s will, it will be because you want it. And the feeling you take away from that is intoxicating and overpowering. You’ll do basically anything for that.”
With all the previous provisos about not being a professional psychologist, I can’t help asking: Does that make it all this… “addictive”?
“Is addictive? It can be addictive – just like anything.”
Good point. Think of exercising, or shopping, or using your smartphone, or watching television!
“Again, this is totally an individual issue.
“But then again (and why I am stressing that this is so individualized) is because a person, and his reactions, are partially the result of his personal view of the world.
“I knew guys who could just go back to their day-to-day lives. And I knew people who had a rough time. Not necessarily because they were ‘addicted’ to being treated like a slut. But because they wanted me to treat them like one.”
Are those different?
“Right away, here, you have another topic that nobody wants to discuss called.”
What’s that?
“The question of ‘abandonment issues.’
“This is why I will never be able to give a one straight answer. Because subs or not, each of these guys are still their own unique creatures that respond differently to same triggers.”
We’ve been talking – and assuming – that the subs are male. Is this always the case? For Forced Bi, I mean. Or could they be any gender?
“During My pro-Domina years, I have preferred male submissives. Ever since I quit seeing clients in real life and have only been active online, I have a preference for very good boys.”
Ooh…yummy! And… what makes a boy “very good”?
“Those who like to go down the rabbit hole.”
Do tell! What does that mean, specifically?
“I prefer them knowing their place before they even approach.”
In person, you mean?
“Online is a whole different world. Not only do you not have the means to whip someone into submission, but also you don’t want to be bothered by trying to do so. It’s time and energy consuming.”
How do you compare in-person and online scenes?
“These are two different worlds. Online, I like them dirty-minded, able to take anything – as it is more of a ‘playground environment.’ This is the opposite of real-life sessions, where you can mold and shape the person to your needs. In-person sessions are journeys, and you’re trying to arrive at the ‘playground.’
“There is no time for that kind of development online. So, like I said, I prefer not just submissives, in general, but submissive males, in particular. Ones whose submission is embedded deep – in their core.”
And that level of submission is a quality found exclusively in certain males?
“Sure, they could be any gender. Just because I haven’t seen it doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist.”
Fair enough. But… you’d be open to non-male submissives, if any were to become interested in “sessioning” with you?
“I encourage anything for personal gain.”
Haha!
“I believe that is what we are all here for. I am certainly not your teacher. And I’m not someone to hold your hand or accompany you on some ‘personal journey.’ I am not a travel companion!”
Wait… does that mean that someone who approaches you must be submissive already? Is that what you mean? I’m confused! Haha. You do or do not cultivate submission in clients?
“Flipping someone, like discussed in a previous answer, is an individual thing. But, on the question of whether or not to ‘flip’ someone, the overriding consideration – the decisive factor, if you will – is: What do I gain?
“But I’m not omnipotent, after all. It is willpower combined with wicked manipulation.
“For your part, a submissive must be certain of what you want. What do you want to get out of it?
“If a prospective sub is willing to submit, then I can start the process of manipulation. But that isn’t unique to any particular fetish. Forced Bi is the cherry on the cake. It’s like an invisible leash, or a mental chastity cage, or a last will and testament with Me as the beneficiary. Does that make sense?”
I’ll have to ruminate on those metaphors!
Please allow me – if I may – to ask you about something more tangible. What Forced-Bi activities do like? For one thing, are we talking mostly about fantasy chat, or do you encourage real, in-the-flesh activities? And, if so, what specifically? Anal sex, bukkake, cock sucking, creampies, cum eating, facials, frottage, kissing, rimming, etc.?
“Frottage is not part of My program, as everything I do requires mutual consent.”
I’m not sure I follow you.
“To My knowledge, in ‘frottage,’ the person being rubbed against must be unaware of it happening. I might be wrong though.”
Oh, okay. Wow. You know, I didn’t realize until this instant that there are two words that are close-cousins, spelling-wise, but that mean different things.
So, you’re quite right. According to Google, “frottage” designates a “practice of touching or rubbing against the clothed body of another person in a crowd as a means of obtaining sexual gratification.”
Yikes. Haha.
Here’s what we meant: Frotting! Wikipedia describes the practice of frotting by saying it’s “…a gay sexual practice that usually involves direct penis-to-penis contact.” So, we’re thinking of it as two guys who intentionally take their clothes off and voluntarily rubs their penises together!
Ou mistake – evidently – is that we assumed that “frottage” and “frotting” came down to the same thing. Now we know!
“However, to answer your question: I have seen it all.”
I’ll bet!
“My experience tells Me when that a sub reaches a state where he starts act out his fantasies in real life – that is, to make fantasy into reality – they want to be unseen, unacknowledged and unheard.”
I thought some subs wanted to be watched – to be seen. No?
“They want to perform, yes. But it’s kind of like they want to dissociate – perhaps out of guilt and such.
“When it gets to this level, as a Domina, you feel an overwhelming sensation of power.
“They want to be treated like trash. Basically, they want to be become an object – a cumdump.”
Mmmm… I shouldn’t think that’s hot, should I?
“They disappear right there – in the midst of the action – right in front of your eyes.
Oh! I see! Gawd… that’s kinky!
“They become insignificant and broken. And, yes, there’s always an agenda behind it all – because they do love telling you how much they want to be corrupted or guided by you.
“But, basically, what they say is that they want this to happen to them.
“And, in fact, the Domina is there just to make it happen for them.
“Are you following Me?”
I think I am, yes!
“Bear with Me.
“So… if you interpret it all this way, on the one hand you can say: It’s a selfish act on their part.”
This is one of the most interesting points I’ve ever run across. But it’s difficult to get a handle on.
I’ve usually only discussed it “off the record” – that is, not as part of any final, published interview. And the reason for the guardedness is somewhat easy to see.
Because… here’s what I understand you to be suggesting. Many times, the Domina is making a sub’s fantasy happen. So, think of a road-trip analogy.
The Domina may be driving the car – or, at least, the Domina is navigating the route. Even still, if it’s the sub’s fantasy being enacted, then the “sub” is picking the destination.
“But in the end…”
(Pun intended or not! You decide!)
“…if – under your care – the sub bends over for another man’s dick; and if you push him to degrade himself and take the humiliation that comes with what happens during a session like that; then it translates into this: You were the dominant that got them ‘off the fence.’
“The fruit of such an act is My favorite to enjoy – regardless of what specific activities were involved.
“I do not care if they sucked a whole bunch of cocks or were sodomized or whatever… as long as they disappear and give up their last bit of autonomy.”
The Domina is something like a genie in Arabic folklore. You grant the sub’s wishes. Though, without fail, the price turns out to be higher than what the sub imagined he would pay.
It’s a “valuation” isn’t adequately reckoned as any per-hour rate. It comes at the cost of his essence or, if you like, his humanity. That’s heavy stuff.
Given the weightiness, I almost hate to ask: Does Forced Bi arouse you, amuse you, or other? And, not to put too fine a point on it, but: What fascinates you most: the gay sex or your power? I feel sure what you’ll say, but…
“I believe I have mentioned this earlier. So, here’s a quick recap. It’s the power, obviously. Maybe more in rare cases. Not everyone can get Me amused that much.
“It becomes like scrolling on the internet. The more you see, the less patience you’ll have – the less you’ll be able to concentrate. So, you’ll jump to the next post.”
Haha! Too true!
Any memorable sessions you’d care to share? Or… anything novel?
“One thing that’s new… since My partner is a Sissy – and perhaps you could say self-made (as this is how he was when I met him) – I am starting to notice that I enjoy his company when fully transformed as a girl.
“Nothing more at the moment: He just functions as a female friend.
“It grows on you, though. So, I am expecting to explore more and to see how far I can take it. My personal favorite fetish would be worship and servitude.
“But… there’s something about boys and their toys, right?”
Haha! Agreed.
How do you see yourself? Are you on the “light side,” playfully promoting healthy exploration; or the “dark side,” corrupting and tempting men to disaster like a mythical siren? Something in between? Something else?
“I am by nature more of a disciplinarian. So, I don’t know how that aligns with Forced Bi and the entire fetish.
“I am easy going with someone until… I strike.”
Bwahaha! I believe you!
“Overall, I would say that I’m ‘light to moderate.’ But I quickly acclimate to any situation and My approach is very much depending on the dynamic of ours.”
You’re adaptable. That makes sense.
Do you have any limits? How do you feel about guys using “poppers”?
“‘Poppers’ refers to a drug that helps people to relax, or to get ‘over the fence’ for anal sex – to become numb for a few minutes, or to get in a state of mind where …no explanation is required.
“I find it irresponsible and dumb. It’s a typical ‘man’s way’ to go about this kind of stuff.
“I especially find it a ridiculous choice when they are visiting a Domina and ask for the use of poppers – as things can ‘go south.’ They can get sick or even die – causing distress and perhaps problems to their Mistress.
“Tell Me how they can seriously believe that they want to ‘please’ or ‘serve’ you, but they are only serving their own desires? They’re like children when they are told not to eat so much candy.
“I interpret this kind of behavior as reckless. Therefore, it’s sad.”
I’m almost afraid to ask, but… How do you feel about guys barebacking?
“‘Barebacking’ is a term I had to look up. So, to answer that one quickly: It is the Domina’s rule, correct?
“But I’ll say the same thing basically goes here as it did with the use of poppers.
“It’s a messed-up world. So, why risk STDs, right? I mean, even people on the dating scene are stupidly barebacking. I wouldn’t recommend it.
“Honestly, though, I do understand it.
“When you watch porn – because… you do – you kind of get turned off when seeing a plastic or rubber shining thing on the penis of the guy. You know instantly that there is no contact between the erect cock and the moist vagina. Where’s the friction? It kills the vibe.
“Do I encourage it? No.
“But – boy! – I do understand why it’s appealing.”
Any comment on married men coming to see you? You see your share of them, I expect!
“Married men come to Me, indeed! And all I can say is that they’re getting a great ‘deal’ in seeing Me as compared to trying to keep a girlfriend on the side.
“Married men are still men, after all. Fathers are still men. Divorced men are men, and widowers are men. They have all the urges of men – urges that are primal. So, there it is.”
You don’t discourage them or feel bad about it?
“I don’t feel a thing and I couldn’t care less. It’s not My problem. Their spouses probably still have the house… and the car… and the credit card. So, it’s a win for everyone!
“That is how most spouses see it too. Only those who don’t really understand the psychology behind all this are taken by surprise when something like this comes to light.
“On the other hand – again, if they would understand the psychology behind it – this isn’t necessarily ‘cheating.’ And I would never want to be referred to as the ‘other woman,’ as I don’t associate with clients or subs this way.”
I gotcha. It’s not “romantic,” you mean.
“I am talking about BDSM in the general way that I see it for Myself. It is, or will evolve into, a deeper connection.
“I can see why that would result in emotional hurt for the wife. But it isn’t something you’re unable to talk out in order to come to a resolution or compromise.”
Does it diminish your opinion of the husbands?
“Are you asking: How do I feel about married men with kids who nevertheless want something shoved up their assholes?”
Well… let’s say, yes!
“In today’s world where even some mannekens are anatomically correct – complete with genitals – I think it’s quite normal.
“I don’t know what else to tell you. I am quite unconcerned. My boundaries and limits are much broader than what a lot of other people have.”
Bwahaha! That’s an understatement! Suits us!
Oh…!
Don’t forget to let readers know where they can find you online!
“Generally, anything relating to ‘Domina Wira,’ ‘Mrs. W.’ or ‘Mrs. W. Enterprises’ are Me and My product.
“Since websites and such might change over time, I’d like to direct readers to My ‘AllMyLinks’ page: https://AllMyLinks.com/DominaWira.
“That’s the utility of a social-media-reference landing page. It collects all the URLs I’m active.”
Thanks so much, Domina Wira!
“Thank you.
“And thanks, everyone, for reading!”
Please connect with us, also: @ForcedBisexual!
(All images of Domina Wira are Copyright 2024, Domina Wira. They are reproduced by Forced-Bi.com with permission.)
[1] Le Petit Prince, Paris: Librairie Gallimard; New York: Reynal & Hitchcock, 1943.