We’ve been trying to make this work for a while, now! I’m glad you’re finally with us! So… hi, and welcome!
Tell everyone: What’s your name?
“I’m Miss Lee and my loyal lifetime sub hub (submissive husband), Rei, calls me ‘dear Lee’.
“A few of my kink friends call me ‘Miss L’, since I’m like a missile – and once I’m focused, I get what I want!”
Ha! That’s too funny!
“But even if I’m a figurative missile, I always keep my cool in heated situations. So, I’d be more like a remote-detonated missile only exploding when I need to. And it has not come to that! (Thank goodness.)”
Well! Thank you for that!
I’ll try to watch what I say, in that case! Haha!
But, I think we’re going to have fun.
Let’s start with this. What “titles” do you prefer? I mean… apart from “Miss.”
“Of all the colorful titles that we dominant women use for our areas of ‘exper-tease,’ Domme best fits me, as I am the dominant one in charge of my relationships – whether they are my marriage, friendships, or business partnerships.”
Right on.
“Before I was married, I considered myself more of a Mistress, since I would enjoy toying and taunting my guy friends as their unattainable, kinky dream girl. But they could never have me as their main squeeze.
“Nowadays, as the very satisfied wife of my alpha sub hub, I find myself in the Mistress role once again, when it comes to our play partners and production-content clients who are looking for that fap-fantasy female to make their wet dreams cum true.
“The best thing about being a Mistress is that I create memorable lasting ‘sex-periences’ – without having actual sex with any of them.”
You weave quite a web with words!
I think “Domme” and “Mistress” certainly befit you.
“I don’t identify with the bratty, ‘mean girl,’ ‘goddess,’ ‘princess,’ or ‘queen’ personas, since I’m quite down-to-earth. I find the elevation of one’s status to a deity a bit too outlandish for me, even in roleplay.”
Fair enough!
“Although, my sub hub acknowledges me as his Goddess, and he is the only one that I consider worthy to worship me.”
Kind of a private thing; I get it.
“Regarding titles, I feel more at home with being the disciplinarian type of Domme who motivates people – specifically submissive boys and men – to have a purpose in their lives, namely, becoming better versions of themselves to serve me better. …Trickling down, to improving their social worth in the world – whether that be the fetish world or their vanilla one.
“The goal is to enjoy both worlds as part of their lives and explore their kinks in a healthier way than just fapping to a screen.”
Am I wrong, then, in thinking that there’s an element of, well… call it “therapy”? – in a non-technical and legally above-board way, of course!
“As a lifestyle Domme and a Mistress, I have a wide range of activities. These include a 24/7 wife-Domme lifestyle; enjoying new role-play scenarios with my alpha sub hub; having fun, while exploring different fetishes; pursuing subtle social awareness for feminism; all while reaching new levels of physical and spiritual connectedness with my partner – through kink and vanilla interactions with each other – and also, through teaming up and sharing our adventures with select others.”
In other words… a complex blend!
How do you think of the people who approach you? I mean… seek you out for this unique “sex-perience” you provide?
“I have a few words to categorize the people – specifically males – who seek out my companionship and services.
“They fall into the following 4 categories: Beta Subs, Needy Gurls, Sissy Sluts, and Dickhead Doms.”
Ha! Dickhead Doms!
“There are the rare few that immediately fall into the asshole and douchebag niche, but those exist when they let their little heads do the thinking and talking for them instead of their brains.”
Do the people who seek out your services ever transcend those general categories?
“I have a select few individuals who have started out with non-sexual, appreciative, intelligent conversation (and compliments) for the creative work that my sub hub and I have done through our online channels.
“These are now valuable kink friends to me and my sub hub. They did their due diligence of ‘advanced, fappy homework’ – which means that, even before messaging me, they had thoroughly browsed our FetLife.com account: ObeyLee, enjoyed the fun visuals of SideofLight.com, the adult online magazine that I co-own with my sub hub, and seen the teaser videos on our PornHub channel https://www.pornhub.com/model/obey-rei-and-lee.”
We’ll do a complete rundown as a wrap up.
“Once people finish a few rounds of tenderizing the hot dog – or circling the taco stand – they are able to approach me virtually / online with a clear head that isn’t cockblocked by their initial, lustful emotions.”
I can see that latter concern can be a real occupational hazard in your line of work!
Can you explain a little more about each of your basic, well… how do you want to refer to them? Classifications, I guess?
“Overall, these ‘classifications’ depend on what type of service or support the person in question is looking for.
“If the person is seeking a strong, dominating, female figure whom they’d like to serve, then they are Beta Subs.
“If the person is more of an attention-whore crossdresser and feminization fan, then they are Needy Gurls.
“If the person is a mix of the needy gurl with a cock-hungry streak and a constant desire for hole-filling, then we have ourselves a Sissy Slut.
“If the person happens to be a self-appointed, self-righteous male Dom with an ‘ego-testicle’ narcissism problem, then they are clearly a Dickhead Dom. These are the double d’s that no one wants to hold.”
Ha! I knew we were in for a wild ride!
“In a nutshell, and until proven otherwise, all men are considered Beta Subs; since I consider my husband to be my ultimate Alpha Sub.”
Okay; I gotcha! I was going to ask: Isn’t “beta sub” a bit redundant?
Now I follow you.
Let me take a step back for a moment and ask a foundational question.
What got you into the world of domination and fetishes, in general – and forced bi in particular?
“The world of domination and fetishes started in my teens …when I was 15 years-old. A cute, gay, high-school friend of mine had lost a bet to me during Halloween and allowed me to collar and leash him as my ‘pet’ for the entire school day.”
Oh, my!
“Even when I was a tomboyish girl in my childhood years, I remember how fun it was to play Cops and Robbers since it involved me putting silly, plastic handcuffs on the robbers – who were just so happy to be ‘captured’ by me.”
Why am I not surprised?!? Lol!
“In my late teens and early 20s, I started figuring out my sexual interests after I grew bored with ‘vanilla’ relationships. I had this one – very innocent – ex-boyfriend that was sexually adventurous. He allowed me to use handcuffs and collars on him. He often expressed his interest in getting ‘forced’ to suck another one of my guy friend’s cock.”
Oh? Well…please, don’t leave us in suspense!
“We ended the relationship before that happened…”
Darn. Lol!!! I’m sure you’ve more than made up for it, since!
“The fantasy never died for either of us, since my ex is now a bi-poly bottom, and I also recently made my sub hub blow a beta sub for me on our anniversary. Talk about a relationship milestone!”
Right?!?
“After a few ‘friends-with-benefits’ (FWBs) relationships with submissive college guy friends, I figured out that men were all just boys who needed discipline in their lives. And I was the one they were attracted to for providing that structure.
“My involvement in the forced-bi fetish (FBF) came naturally as submissive males, more often than not, are intrigued with exploring their homosexual tendencies. And what better way to do it than with a sexy Domme like me ordering you to touch, kiss, and become intimate with another male?”
“What better way?” Indeed!
So… how long have you been offering this, um… way?
“If I were to guess the length of time that I’ve been involved with online domination, I would have to say it’s been about 19 years. …Since I started doing jerk-off-instruction (JOI) and cum-eating instruction (CEI) when I was in my late teens over AOL[1] Instant Messenger with my boyfriend back in the day.
“I had no idea, at the time, that my activities were leading up to my involvement in female domination – or ‘Femdom’ – and forced-bi fetish.”
Now, do you also have a “dungeon,” studio, or other space for face-to-face, in-person, or real-time meets? Or is this just an online thing, for you?
“I have a private studio for real-time meets, and I’m also friends with local dungeon owners who let me host subs in their kinky playground.
“I carefully evaluate subs for different play scenarios, so each sub has a unique experience according to their kinks and fetishes.”
Bespoke fetishism.
What’s your motivator?
I’m sensing that it’s not “all about” the dollars and cents.
“The goals of being a Domme are not as simple as financial gain or desire fulfillment. In no particular order of importance, with each D/s experience, my goals are:
“Training my husband to be a model submissive for others to admire and learn from, while also modifying his behavior so he is more useful to me as well as to others – wherever and whenever I see fit to utilize his services.
“Training my sub hub would allow him to be a better trainer for other subs. So, the student can become a teacher. But he will always be my bitch – underneath my rule.
“Becoming a better Domme and role model for females ‘in the scene.’
“Enjoying myself while giving a combo of pain ‘n’ pleasure to willing recipients.
“Helping subs understand that being under a Domme means being dedicated and respectful of responsible female leadership in their lives, even if they lead another life during their training.
“Making extra income as a bonus to my regular vanilla job.
“Expanding the ‘kink-terests’ (kinky interests) that my sub hub and I showcase – in our adult web magazine and in our naughty social-media channels – so that we present them in such a creative and amusing way that we bring a fresh perspective on existing fetishes.”
You’re right! That’ may be a lot of things, but “simple” isn’t one of them!
So… you mentioned a “vanilla job.” How much of your energy and time does your fetish hobby take up?
“It’s more of a hobby, since I have my vanilla remote job and daily adult responsibilities that take precedence over my kink involvement.
“However, each day includes 3 to 5 hours where my husband and I are updating our Side-of-Light website, communicating with product sponsors, vetting subs, posting to forums on our FetLife account, shooting new content for our PornHub, OnlyFans, and Instagram dedicated to socks: http://www.instagram.com/touchmysocks, and just enjoying my ownership of my sub hub’s cute little butt.
“I would say ‘energy consumption’ with this hobby depends on the day (and night) 😊”
No, I hear you – totally!
Are you satisfied with your current level of involvement?
“I’m satisfied with my level of involvement since the pandemic has significantly increased my health concerns regarding adding other people – even friends – in our play circle.
“Pre-coronavirus, I was hoping to go to kink events like CFNM (clothed female naked male) parties with my sub hub, or even just visit the local dungeons in our area.
“The rate of infection in our sunny state of Florida makes in-person meetings too risky. So, online interactions become the go-to for my sub-vetting process.
“In the meantime, as this lockdown continues, I often experiment on and with Rei, my sub hub, for new kinks – or expand on the ones that we have already. It’s been quite a fun-and-rewarding adventure being married to my loving and ever-loyal, kinky life partner.”
Aw.
“Rei has no idea that I have much more in store for us in the future, but he will love every second because I said so 😊”
Ha! Well…if he wasn’t wise to that already – which I doubt – hopefully, he’ll discover it by reading your finished interview! Haha!
Do you feel comfortable sharing anything else about yourself, on either personal or professional levels?
“I’m a heteroflexible (more hetero than flexible), lifestyle Domme, cis-gender female in her early 30s – newly married to my well-equipped alpha sub hub, Rei. We have a D/s female-led relationship where I have final say over everything in our partnership. But I do listen to him and take his constructive feedback into consideration when it comes to all aspects of our life together.
“We are both content developers. And we co-own a non-profit arts organization together, as well as the kinky adult web magazine Side of Light. I have a vanilla day job as a remote, web-content manager for a charity organization. And Rei works under me as my graphic designer.
“I’m both sapiosexual and demisexual and my sub hub is the same. So, I value intellectual and emotional connections with others more than the baser physical levels. I have hole-exclusivity with my sub hub. So only I am the sole owner – with open admission to any – of his ‘entrances.’
“With regards to my own entrances, those are reserved for Rei, as he treats me better than anyone else can or will.
“This exclusivity has loopholes, as I see fit, according to my needs and the play scenario. I violate the willing holes of subs with my strap-on, and I occasionally allow Rei to use either a strap-on or his condom-encased dick to own the hungry boi pussies of beta subs, as I supervise.
“In that respect, we still have hole exclusivity with one another, but it allows us to violate the willing holes of others together – which is especially fun, as a dominating duo of double penetration.”
I follow you. That makes a lot of sense.
You have certainly thought through your approach.
And that gets me curious. I’d like to probe a little deeper – if I may put it that way! – into your thoughts about the titular fetish.
So, there’s something about being “bi,” and there’s something about being “forced.” So far, so good, lol!
Lemme ask about the bisexuality angle first.
Do you think it’s possible for somebody to be more or less equally attracted to females and males?
“Yes, I believe that true bisexuality is possible. But I haven’t seen it while socializing with other people, since there is usually a deeper attraction to one or the other. It’s not a 50-50, down-the-middle split of being interested in both females and males.
“I believe that with the proper conditioning, true bisexuality can be achieved – as I am using my husband as an experimental subject to see if the peg-play and feminization treatments can sway his heteroflexibility into homoflexibility.”
I perceive that at least one of the operative words, there, is “conditioning.”
So, given that, how do you think about the Forced-Bi fetish?
“I see the forced-bi fetish as a role-play game, where males gain the freedom to explore their bisexual or homosexual tendencies with the supervision of a dominant, female figure.”
Okay, interesting… a sort of game.
“It becomes a natural power trip since the male is allowing the female to control or divert his sexual desires onto another male. Whether he wants to or not, he will succumb to his curiosity for another’s cock.
“And, of course the forced-bi fetish is a fun activity, or else why else would I bother doing it?”
Ha! I’m sure I don’t know!
I should have asked this question previously. But… there are so many variations of the fetish name – “coerced bi,” “encouraged gay,” “enforced bi, “forced gay,” “make-me-bi,” “make-you-gay,” etc., etc. – which (if any!) do you use?
“My preference of fetish name for this kink is ‘forced bi,’ since it usually implies forcing the other person to participate in bisexual activity – whether that’s girl-on-girl or guy-on-guy.
“Typically, anyone who has this fetish already has bisexual tendencies or curiosity. So, I think of it as motivation to go through with their fantasy.”
I gotcha.
So… you said, “girl on girl” or “guy on guy.” Should I take it that you don’t see this fetish as exclusively geared towards male submissives?
“In my point of view, I see forced bi as pertaining to both male and female submission. But in the fetish realm I noticed that it’s more, in-practice relating to submissive males.
“I find it more common between the Dominant-Male / Dom / adult-baby, diaper-lover (ABDL) / mommy-domme; daddy-dom (MDDD) societies that encourages female submission.
“I don’t have any preference for one over the other. But, since I have a submissive husband and I’m naturally a magnet for submissive males, I am more involved with male submission – since no submissive females, as of yet, have been worthy of my time.”
I’ve frequently been told that “it can be for both,” but males are more likely to seek it out – and pay! And there’s been much speculation that appeals to the notion that girl-on-girl sexual involvement is more accepted; male-on-male action, more taboo.
Now, let me ask about the bugaboo word, “forced.”
You say you prefer it. For legal reasons, “forced” has to mean something less than literally compelled by threat of force. But, that leaves a wide range of possible meanings, right?
How do you think of it?
“The second core idea of ‘forced’ is a combination of the arts of power exchange, instruction, motivation, persuasion, and seduction.
“The power exchange of a submissive to a dominant plays a large role in this fetish.
“There is power connected with the instruction as well, since there is a level of trust that the submissive places in their dominant.
“Motivation and persuasion is another driving factor of forced bi, since without proper encouragement to pursue the potential of the bisexual encounter, that fantasy would not be fulfilled.
“Last, but not least, there is an art of seduction here. The sub’s attraction to a beautiful, unattainable Domme is diverted to her other subs. And, by following her orders, he – or she – still achieves winning his (or her) Domme’s attention and approval.
“The combination of these give forced bi the appeal that it has.”
Does Forced Bi change a sub’s sexual orientation?
“With forced bi, I believe that the guys who are attracted to me with this fetish are heteroflexible. They seem to be sexually interested in women to begin with, but I know that they would get turned on by the right type of stimulus from an attractive man.
“However, these guys are either too afraid of societal repercussions of being considered a homosexual, not self-aware enough to know that they are not 100% heterosexual, or secretly want to experience the role reversal of being the one being told what to do.
“There are a vast majority of men who consider themselves to be ‘straight,’ yet – with the appropriate encouragement – would gladly participate in a forced-bi scenario as their expression of obedience, submission, and / or subordination to a dominant woman.”
Is it possible for a guy to be a “switch” or “versatile”?
“Yes, it’s very possible for a guy to function as a switch, and be versatile with his D/s level, to choose from being top or bottom.
“My alpha sub hub is a fine specimen for being a switch in this respect.
“Other subs, however – deep in their hearts – will only be a real top or bottom.
“Fortunately, I have the ability to read that scale within a man even when he doesn’t see it himself. So, I don’t need to worry whether he would be receptive to forced bi or not.
“Gut instinct goes a long way for determining a sub’s forced-bi-fetish answers and how well they play their switch role.”
Some women profess to enjoy guy-on-guy sex. Straight women sometimes liken their enjoyment to that expressed by straight men who like witnessing two women together sexually. And in the case of two women, it is reasonable to think that participants are not always lesbians or even bisexual. They could just be exhibitionists. Other women might just like viewing gay spectacles. And a few, more dominant types perhaps, seem to find the gender-bending and role-reversal aspects appealing.
Do any of these resonate with you?
“I’m the type of woman who enjoys the gender-bending and reversal of the roles of the typical ‘man in charge.’ I’m not a fan of ‘gay spectacles.’
“What are those anyway, rainbow sunglasses?
“Gay men are not just on park benches sensually kissing or sexually involved with one another out in public view. If there is an overly homosexual display of affection somewhere, like a strip club, sex club, or dungeon, I find those to be over dramatic and fake, appealing to the exhibitionists and their voyeurs.
“No offense to exhibitionists and voyeurs who get off from that.
“Back to the gender-bending, everyone knows that behind a strong man there’s a strong woman. In my world of kink, that woman is behind him supporting his sense of sexual adventure, pegging him, and pushing his head onto a cock – whether it’s a strap-on dildo or another man’s cock.
“My level of interest and enjoyment in the forced-bi fetish is dependent on the person or people involved.”
A few women claim to want to date bisexual guys, participate in threesomes with them, etc. Others seem to think that once a guy tries guy-on-guy sex, he’s less desirable to women). What do you think?
“In my opinion, bisexual guys that pass my mental, physical, and psychological criteria can be attractive, desirable, and fun to play with.
“These men are just one of the types of sexual creatures that exist within the male gender in my world of kink. Their sexuality doesn’t have any weight in how attractive they are or aren’t.
“As a side note, I consider a man that has the talent to swallow down an entire cock, skillfully take it balls deep in his ass, while also being able to please a woman in more ways than one, a considerably multi-talented play partner and a bigger turn on than a vanilla straight guy.
“My sub hub fits all three of the above turn-on criteria and, at the end of the day, I still find him very desirable with all his kinks and quirks.”
Is the forced-bi fetish “healthy” or “unhealthy”? …psychologically, I mean.
“The forced-bi fetish can be both healthy and unhealthy.
“For example, I was in contact with a bodyguard at a bar who wanted to be forced to suck my sub hub’s dick. I did not entertain his interest in my sub hub, since I found the bodyguard to be too thirsty and shady with his intentions.
“I later found out that he was so cock hungry that he was willing to take the dick anywhere, even in a public restroom glory hole during COVID-19.
“In that respect, the forced-bi fetish can be unhealthy for subs or Dommes / Doms that are irresponsible with their sexual choices.
“Aside from the potential negative health aspects, I love the concept of sexual freedom and being able to choose your sexual preferences and partners as you wish. However, there is a certain point where that freedom needs guidelines and rules to remain a healthy pastime.
“That’s another reason that I enjoy being a Domme. I teach my subs that even if they need a dose of the ‘Vitamin D,’ or have a hankering for trouser snake, there are precautions and self-maintenance procedures that one takes to preserve sexual longevity, which includes personal hygiene and emotional maturity.”
Forced Bi itself, is – so to speak – neutral?
“I believe the forced-bi fetish is both healthy and unhealthy. Depending on the player, they can really fuck up the game.
“In real-life applications, that means that if the sub was already interested in bisexual activity and was apprehensive about it, as a Domme with access to other subs of similar interests, why not help the shy guy with broadening his guy-on-guy sexual horizons, safely?
“On the other hand, if the sub was not truly interested in bisexuality and was ‘forced’ to try it, that could cause mental or psychological trauma. Hence, one of my bottom lines is that all subs should have similar interests and participate in safe activities that they are comfortable with.
“I don’t believe that this fetish ‘ruins’ guys from having relationships with women. But depending on the sub, it helps them live out their bi fantasies so it stops their curiosity before it becomes a problem – say 20 years into a vanilla marriage. Better to get it out of their system early in their lives; or, allow it to develop properly with the help of a Domme.
“I’m not the kind of Domme that would enforce bisexuality on an unwilling sub because it causes too much drama.”
That’s good.
“I enjoy having subs that are happy with being ‘forced’ to do what was already in their nature, and who feel good that they were able to do it under my supervision.
“It’s beneficial that my submissive husband is my ‘trophy sub’ – so other subs have a ‘hole-some’ role model for the forced-bi fetish, and other kinks.”
Ha!
“He also serves as a figurative security blanket – as an alpha sub for my beta subs to be more comfortable with trying bi-activities for the first time.”
Do you think any of this is religious or spiritual terms?
“For me, the forced-bi fetish is not religious …other than some subs practicing it religiously – like going to cock-whore ‘worship service’ each week, where the donations are emptied into them.”
I see your point!
“Anyway, forced bi, in a spiritual sense, is freeing the sub from thinking they should be ashamed of their slutty, cock-hungry or carpet-munching behavior to experience an enjoyable bisexual adventure with someone of the same sex that they were attracted to and did not have the courage to approach on their own.
“With me, they can practice that safely under my control.
“There’s also something to be said for opening up certain chakras (a.k.a. ‘spiritual energy centers’ of your body) when you experience satisfying sexual activities with someone of the same sex.”
Forced-Bi.com has a few posts (e.g., HERE and HERE) that touch on that (no pun intended).
“When it comes to forced bi, it’s amazing that my sub hub and I are on the same page, and that we must have more than physical connection with the beta sub that we allow into our kinky realm.
“I don’t allow just anyone to be blessed by my husband’s magical staff, or my own dildo of deliverance.”
Ha! Fair enough! The wand chooses the wizard?
Nowadays, some people are opposed to the use of so-called “binary language” – e.g., thinking in terms of “feminine” versus “masculine,” etc. – when it comes to John Money’s concept of “gender” and sexuality. But forced bi, arguably, has a kind of “bi-narism” built into its name.
Do you see this as a problem for the “forced-bi” fetish?
“The binary labeling of the forced-bi fetish is not a problem, per se, since fetish fans that are ‘in the know’ are aware of the concept that sexuality is – historically – described in binary terms.
“These days, that is not true, since sociology and psychology studies have advanced our understanding of people’s sexual desires.
“Most individuals start out their lives without a solid sense of what their sexual preference is – until hormones set in. There are a few that know from childhood what sexual tendencies they do and don’t have.
“Knowing this, binary language is not often considered in the realm of problems for the forced-bi fetish, since the fetish world is full of conflicting terms (i.e. ‘consensual non-consent’).”
I have made a similar point to the handful of people who object to the adjective “forced.” After all the obligatory legal disclaimers are duly noted, “forced” is probably best regarded as a term of art – not unlike the word “slave,” which is often invoked by fetishists in a non-literal sense.
“If you plan to play with me and my sub hub, leave ‘bi-narism’ at the door, since you’re already blurring the line of masculine-feminine division by expressing an interest in forced bi to begin with.”
Let’s descend from the ivory-tower a moment, and from these fascinating linguistic explorations, and talk about something more carnal and, well… visceral.
What forced-bi shenanigans do you most enjoy ordering or watching?
“The homosexual activities that give me the most enjoyment would be: mutual masturbation, one-sided oral sex, 69-ing, and – if the subs are willing / receptive –penetrative sex, either with dildos or cocks (condoms required).”
If there’s penetration, then someone’s surely “receptive”! Ha!
Anything that you prefer to ‘pass’ – or “swipe left” – on?
“In general, seeing guys or girls kiss each other is not a turn-on for me.”
Interesting.
“On that note, I have yet to find a guy worthy, attractive, and healthy enough for my husband to kiss, and that goes the same for me, as I have yet to encounter a woman worth my time …and spit.
“However, seeing a guy skillfully take a cock down his throat, or having a girl creatively lick a clit, gets my engine going.”
Ooh! I’m feeling a bit revved up myself, now that you mention it!
Do you think that Forced Bi, as a fetish, is getting more popular?
“This relates back to the binary-language question, since the popularity of the forced-bi fetish is growing due to acceptance of the fact that gender and sexual preference is not binary.”
I’ve gotten several answers like that that. But a few respondents have said something to the contrary.
These interviewees hypothesize that Forced Bi only has the appeal that it has because it’s still taboo. In other words, the argument is something like this.
If it’s fetishized, then it’s not yet accepted, and if it’s accepted, then it’s not fetishized.[2]
“Statistics tend to speak for themselves. My experience in the fetish world increased when I openly stated in my FetLife profile that my husband was actively interested in forced-bi activities. Many other subs came out of the woodwork expressing support or similar interests – even if their profiles listed them as ‘straight’ or ‘Dom.’
“Forced bi does not mean you’re gay or lesbian, but you definitely aren’t 100% straight.”
Do you perceive that the Forced-Bi fetish is being promoted in any way by the so-called “mainstream media”?
“No. Not that I know of.”
I just thought I’d ask! It’s a question that gets responses all over the spectrum.
“Our Side of Light magazine is a way for us to reach out and raise awareness for sexual freedom with safety in mind.”
A bit of social activism. I gotcha.
Which do you prefer, having guys in dedicated roles, or having both guys being plastic enough to perform in any role I want?
“When I’m with two subs, I prefer that my husband is the dedicated top and alpha sub while the other sub is the beta-bitch cocksucker.”
Ha! I kinda figured you might say that.
“It’s just proper D/s hierarchy that my alpha sub hub teaches the lower level sub how to suck cock properly – since he has an 11” kielbasa. What better way for the beta sub to learn how to blow a real man?”
Ha! I’m not going to gainsay you, there!
“If they can successfully swallow all that meat, they earn a chance at riding my amazing horse.”
Are you aroused by forced bi, or just amused by it?
“I’m mostly amused by the forced-bi fetish. The excitement only happens since I get turned on by ordering my husband to own the holes of other subs.”
That’s hot…
“Oftentimes, forced bi just makes me laugh, since beta subs are usually awkward and shy – but totally obedient and open to anything I say. Even when my husband’s cock gets bigger than my forearm, and I tell them, ‘swallow it or I’ll whip you,’ the beta sub will give in to their bisexual curiosity.”
Mmmmm. How does that usually, um… end?
“No one has gotten the whip. Yet. 😉”
Do you think that a guy can “just try” sucking cock or getting assfucked and then quit?
“Yes. It’s quite possible that a guy quits after doing anything bisexual once, whether it’s cocksucking or assfucking, or anything else.
“However, in my experience, forced-bi quitters are just on a little vacation / break from attempting it again.”
Um… so, can a guy really quit, after all?
“Doing a bisexual activity ‘just once’ in a lifetime is quite rare – but may happen, for example, if it was a bad experience or someone just wanted to fulfill a fantasy.
“Bisexuality, in general, isn’t something you ‘quit’ – like a job or a hobby. It’s a sexual preference. So, if you had romantic or sexual interest in a person of the same sex, that isn’t something you just try once, that’s a part of who you are.”
What are you interested in doing? I mean… do you issue orders and leave it to the subs? Or do you take their hands and facilitate? Or… something in between?
“I usually test the guy on where he stands with bi behavior.
“Oftentimes, they were already interested in pursuing it and made elaborate plans for it to happen, but… were too scared to carry them out on their own.
“I advise these subs to make sure their choices of play partners are healthy and safe and to screen them online before meeting up, especially with the pandemic going on.”
How “involved” do you like to be?
“My involvement with the forced-bi fetish is typically suggesting more responsible methods for guys to enjoy their encounters (e.g., wearing protection, having a reliable friend call in case of an emergency, always having lube, etc.) and motivating them to have the balls to get out there to find a willing partner.
“I make sure to remind them that if they were truly bi, they would have a Domme – not necessarily me – in the same space… directing them, being a naughty voyeur, or joining in, depending on what they prefer or agree upon.
“I enjoy when subs have photo or video evidence of their forced-bi experiences, as that proves that they carried out what other men have only fapped about. It enables me to be able to provide the approval (or disapproval) and feedback of what they accomplished (if anything at all).
“In certain situations, I have supervised and participated as the female in a female-male-male threesome (FMM), where I enjoyed throat fucking the beta sub with a strap-on dildo while my alpha sub hub was owning the ass of the same beta sub, spit-roast style.”
Oh, my. Am I a bit red in the cheeks?
“I was also able to fuck My alpha sub hub while he owned the boi pussy of the beta sub. It was a real ‘sub-sandwich’ type of day.”
I can imagine!
What is your biggest focus/turn on?
“With forced bi, my biggest turn on is being able to control my husband’s cock and direct it into hungry beta-sub holes.
“It makes me laugh to see the beta subs struggling with handling all that sausage in whatever hole I choose. Plus, it’s exciting to see my alpha sub hub in action to do what pleases me.”
Right?! 11”? The thought is making me squirm.
What sexual acts, if any, really charge your batteries?
“I love when my top-alpha sub hub puts a bottom-bitch-beta sub in his rightful place: being bent over, on his knees (or on all fours) attempting to take my husband’s trouser snake sliding into all holes.”
Have mercy!
“Everything that he does to the beta sub, I have already done to my husband, so he has more than earned his place as my trophy alpha.”
All right; let me simmer down by asking you… Do you have any limits?
“Yes. I have numerous limits, since I have very specific criteria for my own sex life and ‘kinkterests.’ I also enforce limits with my subs, to provide everyone with a healthier, more sanitary, and mentally sound play environment.
“Those limits include (in no particular order): individuals with contagious diseases (including COVID-19), bloodletting, needle play, spitting, scat, piss / watersports, human toilet, human ashtray, waterboarding, anything with underaged individuals / kids, incest, racism / race shaming, animals, branding, scarring, non-consensual permanent damage, ABDL (anything diaper or baby-related), MDDD (mommy domme / daddy dom) play, big / little, age play, smell / odor-related kinks, extreme impact play, people with neurological conditions / seizures, people with cardiovascular / heart conditions (no offense, this is just a safety measure), people with substance abuse issues, people on mood-altering meds (prescriptions or otherwise), hairiness / hirsute people, uncut cocks, unshaved pussies, noisy ignorant assholes, atrocious grammar, and other limits that come along as I continue this sexual adventure that is my married life.”
Know thyself, n’est-ce pas?
How do you feel about guys having gay sex without condoms (i.e., “barebacking”)?
“I completely oppose guys barebacking and I always insist on safe, protected anal sex; it’s too dangerous, otherwise.
“Besides, that’s an exit hole, and no amount of enemas or cleansing can eliminate the fact that the ass is a poop chute. Stuffing a cock into it is like pushing your finger into a pudding cup – there’s no way you aren’t getting microscopic intestinal bacteria on your dick.
“It’s condoms or no anal sex for my subs. Simple.”
Thanks for being forthright.
“The alternative would be to use strap-on dildos on themselves. And even those would have condoms on them.
“It’s always safety first when it comes to play and D/s scenarios.”
I’m sure a lot of readers respect that.
Based on that answer, I’m guessing I can predict your response, here. But…How do you feel about STDs and STD risk?
“As one of the most responsible Dommes that I know, I value my subs’ health and well-being – whether it’s my sub hub, a close friend, or a play partner. STDs and contagious diseases are not a joke and can be fatal.
“It’s morally wrong to knowingly spread disease and engage in risky sexual behavior.
“I understand that there is a level of thrill at risky sex with anonymous partners. However, there are ways to get your thrills without putting your life or other’s lives on the line.
“No sex is worth dying over. Being socially conscientious about how your health affects others is just being a responsible, sexually active adult.”
Thanks for that.
“As a side note, you can’t pimp out a diseased fuck toy – and you’re polluting the ecosystem of a safe, clean play environment, which everyone deserves.
“Dommes and Mistresses that allow, encourage, or enforce unprotected risky sex (i.e. bareback, bareback anal, ass-to-mouth, etc.) are just wrong in my book, and don’t deserve to have subs under their control.
“Think about it this way, if one irresponsible indifferent Domme allows even one of her subs with an STD to fuck someone, an entire kink network is potentially exposed.
“Wrap it before you tap it.”
Your words are well worth pondering. A wayward Domme can’t contaminate the entire fetish “well” if everyone else is practicing safe sex.
How about married guys? Opinions, there?
“As the wife in a loving and happy, kink-friendly marriage, I enjoy forced bi with my husband. I prefer our partners to be single men, men in open relationships, or kink-friendly married couples.
“I’m not an intentional marriage-ruiner nor homewrecker. So, I personally don’t go out of my way to search for married men as my potential subs, since they often have limited time, funds, and resources for the type of experiences that I offer. Additionally, they often do not wish to play with my husband, who is always there during my sessions.
“If a sub was married and worth my time, I wouldn’t reject him. I make it a point to find out what level of secrecy or openness they are at with their significant other so I can accommodate that during our interactions.
“On a similar note, I’m not a ‘blackmail’ Domme who uses the sub’s kink to extort money or favors. I find that type of underhanded behavior – even if requested by the sub – to be extremely stressful and time-consuming; two adjectives that I avoid in both my vanilla and kink life.”
Ha! I hear ya!
How do you feel about amyl-nitrite inhalers (“poppers”)?
“I’m a Domme that prefers her subs to either be clear-headed during play. So, poppers are not of any interest to me.
“I allow alcohol use, and I don’t mind if subs do recreational drugs on their own on their own time – as long as it’s not around the play environment, and it doesn’t affect their sexual performance, mental health, and comprehension abilities when they are with me.”
How do you feel about guys really getting addicted to gay sex?
“I think this question is a little silly. But it makes a valid suggestion that gay sex can be addicting.
“Gay sex a-dick-tions, and being cock-centric, can happen to anyone, not only guys.
“I do think that the probability of having a gay-sex addiction depends on the sub’s personality and the likelihood that they are replacing one thing for another (for example, an oral fixation on cocks instead of junk food, using anal sex as a punishment for not being good enough to please women, etc.).
“Or, the sub could be using the feelings they get from gay sex to fill a void in their life that is temporarily forgotten – by having their holes filled by hard cocks (i.e., the thrill of being discovered, familiarity / comfort of being intimate with someone of the same sex, humilation of enjoying being fucked by a man, etc.).
“In a way, addictions are just different methods people use to overcompensate for issues that they have in their lives. If a sub could find a balance, a happy moderation of gay sex, between what is too much and what is too little for them to be a functional healthy person, then the ‘addiction’ would just become a controllable habit or a leisurely pastime.
“There are people who are prone to addiction and others who are able to make gay sex a fun part of their daily life.
“I would love to see subs find happiness in balancing their kink and vanilla lives without the threat of addiction, to either cocks or gay sex. But you can never tell with subs and their often-fickle minds. So, it’s good to keep close tabs on them to keep ’em in check.”
I see what you mean.
Thanks for sticking with me this long.
Just a few more odds and ends…
Do you have any other fetishes or activities that you like to participate in, direct, or instruct?
“My fetishes, in no particular order, include: Femdom scenarios (especially roleplay and bondage), wearing tight sexy clothing or business attire while Domming, relaxing at home making my sub hub wear sexy outfits for me, predicament play, interrogation bondage, strapon play / peg play, being my husband’s photo model, taking videos of our sexy activities, feminization / sissification of willing men, tease and denial, male chastity enforcement, mild CBT (cock n’ ball torture), high heel / sexy boots / foot worship, foot play, WAM (getting wet n’ messy), putting subs in hoods / blindfolds, crossdresser (CD) training, rope play / shibari,[3] putting subs in vacuum beds, putting subs in mummification / encasement, sensory deprivation, zentai,[4] wearing sexy socks, cosplay,[5] making subs wear uniforms, collecting kinky toys, jack-off instruction (JOI),[6] enforcing service-oriented submission, and physical training for subs.”
Quite a varied set of interests!
So, tell us: How can fans and other interested persons check out your work?
“Kinky Adult Web Magazine: Side of Light: http://www.sideoflight.com
“PornHub Channel: https://www.pornhub.com/model/obey-rei-and-lee/videos
“FetLife Profile @ObeyLee: https://fetlife.com/users/903905
“Wet n’ Messy Videos: https://thatkindashow.umd.net/
“OnlyFans Private Videos & Custom Content: https://onlyfans.com/obeyreilee
“Twitter: https://twitter.com/AdventureRe
“Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sideoflight/
“Naughty Artwork Archive (click on the drawings for the compilation)
“https://obeyleemeow.tumblr.com/post/147018491307
“Reader’s note: Please be aware that all these sites are Not Safe For Work (NSFW) and not advisable for viewing around mixed company. So, mind your surroundings when you click on them. I take no responsibility for you distractedly walking into a post once you see any of our posts 😊”
You have been warned!
Well, Miss Lee… thank you so much for gracing us with your expertise – and wit!
Forced-Bi.com wishes you and your “sub hub” all the best as you conclude 2020. Here’s to a kinky and prosperous 2021!
Notes:
[1] AOL = America Online, an early, popular internet-service provider
[2] At least, this is the way I understood the responses of some Mistresses, especially in the interview posted HERE, but also… HERE.
[3] Shibari designates Japanese rope-bondage, or Kinbaku.
[4] Zentai, about which you can read more HERE, is another borrowing from our kinky friends in the “Land of the Rising Sun.”
[5] “Cosplay” = costume play – dressing up; for example (without limitation), as comic-book or video-game characters
[6] “JOI” is also sometimes referred to as jerk-off instruction